


Tsukiakari no Dentist

by pastelkanan



Category: Uta no Prince-sama
Genre: @ GC I HOPE IT WAS WORTH IT, Implied Sexual Content, LET ME DIE, M/M, One Shot, do not take this seriously, first and foremost i would like to apologize, gc made me do it, i was in a hurry to finish this and i cant actually write smut so, im disappointed in myself, just imagine that it happened ok, thank fuck i would kill myself if this wasnt just a one shot, this is a massive inside joke, this is not a serious fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-24
Updated: 2016-04-24
Packaged: 2018-06-04 03:51:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,611
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6640288
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pastelkanan/pseuds/pastelkanan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After a long day at a photo shoot, Camus gets a toothache. Ai, being the good boyfriend he is, offers to take a look. Shenanigans and possible dick sucking ensue.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tsukiakari no Dentist

**Author's Note:**

> IM SORRY IT WASNT MY IDEA

It started innocently enough. Annoying, naturally, but innocent. Somebody had had the  _ genius _ idea of a ball pit photoshoot to promote the band’s new duet CD, and so there they were: all of Quartet Night being told to get in various positions while doing incredibly childish things. One photographer had been quite insistent on a pose for Ai which involved some very… suggestive positioning of balls from the pit. It was a bit awkward and even though there was more than just  _ that _ to the photo, it went without saying that Camus was less than thrilled. Then again, he was never thrilled. The most excited he ever seemed to get was when he found out that some limited edition pastries were on sale. 

This was a different state of  _ not thrilled _ for him, though. The crew didn't know it and their kouhais didn't know it and, as far as anyone was aware, not even Shining knew it--which was a miracle considering that the man seemed to be a demon hiding in a human skin--but Reiji and Ranmaru knew. As long as Camus and Ai didn't say anything about those two, they wouldn't say anything either. And so the inner workings and relations among Quartet Night were kept secret, all wrapped up with a nice little bow. 

_ This _ was an outrage. Even though it wasn't exactly a known fact that Ai had been built and not born, it was absurd the way some people looked at him like a piece of meat. Technically he was metal and wires and circuit boards and memory storage, but even if he hadn't been all of that and he had been a regular person, he wasn't exactly the best person in the band to be put in suggestive poses. That was why they had Ranmaru. Why hasn't they asked  _ him _ for that pose?

Sure, it was possible that they hadn't  _ intended  _ for it to come across the way it was, but it  _ did _ and Camus was absolutely  _ livid _ . This was worse than the time Cecil let a colored sock fall in with the whites and Camus had to replace some of his best clothes since they had all become a shade of purple.

Camus was  _ not  _ getting paid enough to work with these imbeciles.

 

-

 

He had a cup of sugar with a side of tea to calm his nerves when they were all back at the dorms. He was halfway through the cup when he first noticed the dull ache in one of his back teeth. It was even more irritating than that photoshoot earlier. Why was it always him? Why did he get stuck with the worst people and the worst luck? Going back home to Permafrost was an idea that had an ever-increasing level of appeal. Though, getting free of Shining’s grip was bound to be much harder than it sounded. 

He unconsciously reached up and started rubbing his jaw about the time there was a gentle knock at the door. It wasn’t Reiji or Ranmaru, then. Thank the stars. He didn’t have the willpower to get through another interaction with them without seriously hurting someone. “Come in,” he said. At least, he  _ tried _ to make it a statement and not a command. Cecil was off doing, well, whatever he did all day. Camus didn’t know. He didn’t really care as long as he wasn’t messing something up.

The door opened with a soft creak. Camus made a mental note to tell Cecil to oil the hinges. No door of his was going to  _ creak _ when it opened. Only peasants had creaky doors. He was no peasant. “The others make so much noise,” Ai said as he stepped inside and shut the door behind him. “Your room is the best place to avoid being bothered.”

Camus nodded to the chair across the table from him. “Have a seat. There’s no point staying around those hooligans.”

Ai seated himself and his eyes immediately focused on where Camus was rubbing his jaw. “Is something wrong?” he asked. Slowly but surely he was getting more and more used to actually asking questions instead of simply running possibilities through his databases. Living with unpredictable idiots did that to a person.

Camus sighed. “One of my teeth hurts.” He waved a hand to try to move on to a different topic. “It’s no trouble. I’m sure the others were being much more troublesome than this.”

“You need to take better care of your teeth.” Ai was entirely unphased by the attempt to derail the conversation. “Would you let me take a look? You may have to go to the dentist if it’s serious.”

Another sigh. For the most part, there were no problems in their relationship. They understood each other much better than any of the others did. Camus knew the truth about Ai before anyone else had. Ai never said much that wasn’t necessary. Reiji and Ranmaru were two of the noisiest people Camus had ever had the displeasure of meeting, but Ai balanced them out. Ai was the only sane one in the dorms. Unlike  _ some _ people, Ai was actually capable of doing things properly.

And he was comfortable. At the end of the day, Camus knew that Ai was a collection of circuit boards and wires. He had heard the horror story of Aine. He knew about the professor and how he had come to join Quartet Night. Knowing that Ai was just a replacement, a  _ stand in  _ for a man in a coma wasn’t exactly a happy thought, but that hadn’t stopped him from developing a real bond with Ai. Robot or not, Ai was Ai and Camus couldn’t deny that he had feelings for him. Ai, bless his metal heart, did his best to return those feelings. Even if he wasn’t fully capable of a human’s range of emotions, he was far more content around Camus than he was with anyone else. They made it work.

That was how Camus ended up trying to keep his mouth open as wide as he could while Ai shined a flashlight at the left side. It was easily one of the most awkward experiences Camus had never been through. He couldn’t decide what he hated more, being forced to have his mouth gaping open like a fish or having his boyfriend hovering over his face with a flashlight.

He decided that the thing he hated the most was when Ai pulled away and told him, “It looks like you’ve got a cavity back there. You should go to a proper dentist to see for sure.”

Oh,  _ lovely. _

 

-

 

“Stop messing with your mouth,” Ai pretty much ordered on the drive home. “You’re just going to make it hurt worse.”

Camus looked out the window. It had only been a couple of days since Ai first saw the little spot he insisted was most likely a cavity. The fact that there were walk-in dentist offices available was more than a bit troubling, but since Ai was, well,  _ Ai _ , he had insisted on getting Camus in as soon as possible to get everything taken care of. They had given him some sort of gas to inhale to supposedly calm his nerves, they had given him two shots of a numbing agent, and they had put a biting block in the right side of his mouth while the dentist and his assistant went at his mouth with tools he couldn’t be bothered to learn the names of.

It had been uncomfortable, boring, and tedious. And since he was an adult, he had been expected to go through the whole process by himself. It wasn’t that he  _ needed _ Ai there while he was going through the process of getting the cavity filled, not really. It was just that he would have preferred to have someone else in the room. He had never had problems with his mouth before. No cavities, no braces, nothing. His teeth were naturally perfect until this  _ one little flaw _ reared its ugly head and tarnished his perfect record. 

If the others found out what had happened, that he had gotten something so commonplace and avoidable as a  _ cavity, _ he was never going to hear the end of it.

 

-

 

Even though he would never openly admit it unless he had to, Camus had been wrong before. Several times, actually, but who counted? He had been wrong to assume a lot of things. He had made some… subpar choices. Not to mention that English opening of his song “Aurora.” Reiji had teased him for  _ months _ as if he had actually written the song himself. He was far above writing his own songs.

He had thought that, considering how Ai was an andriod and all, there wasn’t going to be much in the way of  _ that _ sort of intimacy. There wasn’t really a need. After a day of having his mouth messed with by strangers, though, he wasn’t going to complain when Ai made a crude joke about it wasn’t fair that Camus had to go through having his mouth full and Ai didn’t, even if Camus had to deal with needles and scraping tools instead of, well, yeah. Thank the heavens for locks on doors and curtains on windows.

Camus blamed Ranmaru for Ai’s knowing about sliding dirty jokes into casual conversation. He considered confronting him about it sometime later. He also considered how he was going to make sure he never had to go to a  _ dentist _ ever again.

Mostly, though, he considered how Ai was on his knees in front of Camus doing some  _ awfully lewd _ things. There really was a first time for everything, apparently.

**Author's Note:**

> 1.) I would not have written this if the gc hadn't voted and decided that I had to write this fanfic based off of one of our best memes  
> 2.) This is the photo that inspired the beginning sequence and the ~pose~ bullshit with Ai thanks for providing me with this quality content Shoutan: https://41.media.tumblr.com/a302f2b828f0a08406655ab33d29948a/tumblr_o5f6ayPPKy1s9xj2ko2_400.jpg  
> 3.) Still not my fault  
> 4.) The worst part is that there's still gc-requested fanfics that I have to write I'm so sorry but they apparently elected me as the official gc fanfic writer and I have to do my job


End file.
